T-minus 3 days!! Christmas is RIGHT around the corner and I couldn’t be more excited! I’m in a holy, jolly mood and I am so truly happy to be visiting with family and to be feeling so incredibly blessed in this season. If I’m being truthful though up until about 3 days ago I was having a hard time feeling continuously happy. Weird I know, but it’s true. I would feel so content spending time with my family, and then that awful voice in the back of my mind would say, “Don’t relax. You have 3 papers to write before January. You should be working.” “Oh, you missed a blog post. Your perfect streak is over.” Or I would just remember happy memories from the past that were going to be different this year. It was hard to get those things out of my head and truly be with the people around me. In my previous post I talked about how I thought that a break in school would automatically bring me closer to God just because I wasn’t so busy, and how that has proven not to be the case.
More and more in this season of my life I am beginning to see that God is trying to teach me that ultimately the choice is mine. I have to chose what kind of Christian I’ll be. I have to chose to be a committed Christian. I have to chose to be a loving friend. As much as I would like to think that the ability to be in control of my emotions and actions, the voice in the back of my head, the devil, has an amazing way of crushing my confidence and bringing me right back to something I thought I’d overcome and discouraging me to the point where I feel like quitting.
Here’s the truth. That’s never going to go away, being a Christian will never be easy. You will never reach a point in your life where the right thing comes naturally. That doubt and self deprecation will always be hard wired into you. Here’s the important truth. We have a God who has been through the same tough thoughts and struggles on earth. He has overcome and He will give us strength when we ask for it. It might feel like God has walked away but every time I have felt that way it has been because I’ve made poor choices and pushed Him away.
Bottom line: God is always the same unwavering miraculous savior He has always been, Our earthly emotion may cloud our vision of Him, but if we reach out and earnestly pray God will draw you up out of the earthly confusion and disappointment that pulls us away. The joy that God gives is the sweetest most peaceful comfort. So continue your mission for faith. Purposefully chose to be filled with the joy of our savior.
Then remember, sometimes you don’t feel it like a magic cloud of joy floating down on you but when you reach out to God He will show you His perfect plan, in His perfect timing!
Mission For Faith 